Shortly after this appointment, I began the meltdown and spiral into complete and utter hopelessness. The medication was not working, I was reacting badly to another medication, the muscle relaxants left me feeling loopy, and physical therapy hurt even more than I had thought possible. Luckily, I had already made my appointment with the breathing teacher, and I was grasping desperately for any help at this point. I dragged myself to see her.
I cannot even explain the magic of that appointment. Yes, I learned the first few breathing techniques, but I also experienced a magical, soothing calm just from being in Kathleen's presence. She guided me into a relaxation state, soothed me into deep breathing, and for the first time in so many months, brought me out of panic. My Inner Healer was absolutely right. This was the woman I needed to see. This was the beginning of my journey, the impetus for the surrender into acceptance and the move forward into healing my emotions. I will be forever grateful for every part of that experience and all that I learned from Kathleen as she worked with me over the next several months.